I'm the ex-girlfriend...
"You and your museum of lovers
The precious collection you’ve housed in your covers...
So why do we choose the boys that are naughty?
I don’t fit in so why do you want me?
And I know I can’t tame you…but I just keep trying...
So I pacify problems with kisses and cuddles
Diligently doubtful through all kinds of trouble
Then I find myself choking on all my contradictions..."
I am a Systems Engineer for a major company. In my spare time, I like to hang out with friends. I'm pretty much up for anything, just so long as I will have fun.
I am a major bookworm, and I am embarassed to say, but I love the Harry Potter series, I even went to a couple of book events for it.
I am very passionate about music and I play a few instruments (Euphonium, Flute, Piano, Violin). As from everyone who is passionate about music, I definitely have my opinions about everything I hear...sometimes I can be worse than Simon Cowell.
I met Gabe in the 1992-1993 school year, my 7th grade year. We met in a Parks and Recreation Community Theater class. By this time, I had been in this theater class for about three years, however, this was Gabe's first class and his mother thought it would be a great elective for his home schooling education. Around town, Gabe was known as the neighborhood bad boy. He was being home schooled because he was expelled from his Elementary School and they did not have a continuation school for kids his age, so his mom was left to home school him.
I kinda thought that Gabe liked me through most of the year, but a few months after my dad died, it seemed like he was worth dating. I was excited about it, because he was kinda cute, kinda bad and he was totally in love with me. I dated him for 10 months and ended up breaking up with him just after the New Year in 1994.
However, during that time, he taught me the appreciation of Heavy Metal music and I have been a Metallica fan ever since. Along with that I turned into a Nirvana, Pearl Jam, and Aerosmith fan. So, I think the only thing that I really gained in a positive way was an appreciation for music. I knew I liked it, but I didn't know how much I could like it.
More things that Gabe taught me: not to care what other people think, to have confidence in myself, how to rebel, how to drive my mother batty, how to be a bad ass, how not to be so naive, and how to not go with what is popular because it is popular. Really, what Gabe taught me was how to be a feminist before I was ever one, by merely teaching me how to not succumb to what society expects me to be. He was all about "No Labels" and the "Punk" philosophy and since I dated him in that very fragile time period of puberty, he has become a part of me, but I use him in a way that benefits me instead of harms me. He had a tendency to do a great deal of self-destruction.
It sounds like things were roses, but in actuality, they were not. I soon became to detest his attitude and the only reason I stayed with him for as long as I did was to help him break his record of how long he dated a girl. A really dumb reason, but I was 13 by that time, what did I know? Practically nothing, only how to piss my mom off and annoy everyone around me, which I did with a smile on my face.
What really was the deal breaker was that he started using drugs. This drug usage opened his mind to bisexuality, in which I found out when he called me and he was high. Gabe had lots of problems besides his attitude, he frequently smoked Marijuana as well as cigarettes. Although for most of the time he was dating me, I told him I would not continue to see him if he kept up those habits, so he "gave them up for me." Only, he really did.
You see, his mother and I had a conversation. She noticed that since Gabe and I had been dating, he stopped smoking (she didn't know about the Mary Jane), something she could not get him to stop. So, she told me that I was a good influence on her son. If a mother of your boyfriend ever tells you that you are a good influence for her son and your own mother thinks that your boyfriend is a bad influence on you, dump him and run for the hills. You don't want to be known as the one who improves someone while they defamate your character. Unfortunately, I took this as a compliment. It was a compliment, but one no mother should make to her son's girlfriend when she knows her son is a loser.
Other things that happened, Gabe pushed me into being more sexually advanced for my age, we did not have sex, but there were other things he did instead (no need to go into detail). The point of that is I was pushed into doing things that I did not want to do. I learned that a guy should never push you into doing things that you do not want to do and that at 12 and 13 you should not be doing those things anyhow. He also cheated on me with his ex-girlfriend, which I think made me grow to despise him. I also used to lie to my mother to see him.
When he went to Jr. High, his school was right next to my house. So, I would take the dog for a walk when he got out of school and meet him around the block. We used to smooch where I thought my mom couldn't see me, but the neighbors could and did. So they would tell my mom about it and I would lie and get busted for it. After a while my mom just let me see him figuring it wouldn't last long anyways and really it didn't last very long. However, Gabe was my first "serious" relationship, not my first love, because I didn't really love him and I realize that now. It took me a while to get over this relationship enough to want to date again. So, looking back, time for the Karma Stats for this relationship.
